My daughters future is on the line PLEASE HELP!!

My daughter is being expelled for a mistake of being friends with another girl, my daughter was walking in hall to go to her class when her friend ran up to her and handed her a bag and ran off when my daughter looked it was a small bag og weed she got scared and put it in her bra but someone seen and told and now they want to kick her out she is a A/B student and is very smart if she knew what is was before hand she wouldn't have taken it! she is telling she will kill herself if they dont let her graduate in 5 months from 8th grade and the school has a police officer on site all the time and he treaten her with harm from dogs if she didnt tell them everything ie; your additive to drugs or your selling them etc.. on true please help me this is my childs life!

P.S she also got 3 tickets for all this we went to court and judge threw tickets out as long as she completes 40 hrs. of community service which she started before they told her to.

anna595:

she is telling she will kill herself if they dont let her graduate in 5 months

I would be contacting a psychiatrist to evaluate the daughter.  You are "hearing" only her side of what is taking place; she has to provide community service; you don't mention if you've spoken with teachers/counselors to get their review of her, etc.

But the fact is that a suggestion of intent to "kill herself" -- especially after allegedly hiding drugs for "someone else," having to provide community service -- is a red flag.

It's up to you to help her. 

The thing that you need to realize is that kids always say almost exactly what your daughter said. Someone ran up to me in the hall and handed me this bag that turned out to be full of MJ (or whatever illegal substance was found.). School administrators and the local police are likely to be rather "skeptical".

Moreover, you can bet the monthly rent or mortgage money that the kid who handed her the bag will deny doing so and have no trouble throwing your daughter under the bus.

Did she roll on friend and was friend expelled?

Its possible that child only tells parent 20% of truth?

My problem with schools is that the typically fail to squeeze hard enough to indentify the true dealers. One parent told me flatout his daughter would refuse to roll because dealer could do more harm than could school--sorry state of affairs. Me, I think failure to roll warrants triple punishment.

The ability of school to expel is probably contained in school law and board policy or some combination of both .

It may or may not contain what most lawyers think is reasonable due process protections --but whatever protections are in there I suggest you do a crash course and exercise your options--use paid legal defense counsel if possible.

I'm not in your state--but in my state the school can boot kids by front door  but law requires they provide a free public education by side door--even if kid were to live in Juvie Hall--odds are similar provisions exist in your law--and they may be required to provide "homebound" after a few weeks.  Graduation from 8th grade is not one of life's critical events--getting into 9th may be--focus!  Actually I don't think in my state a homebound student can be penalized not to graduate or to get promoted if grades are OK --but I'm not in your state.

Drew:

My problem with schools is that the typically fail to squeeze hard enough to indentify the true dealers.

They aren't required to.  Most schools now have adopted a "zero tolerance" policy when it comes to drugs and weapons on campus.  Get caught with either one and you are out.  There have been a number of kids who accidently brought one or the other to school forgetting they had it in a back pack or their car and suffered the consequences.  The schools do not adopt a fluxuating policy.

I agree that the story the parents are getting is likely a small percentage of the truth.  After all the kid is already in trouble with the school and will say or do just about anything to mitigate the damage at home on top of the school.  The bigger problem is a child threatening suicide for any reason.  That is a threat that MUST be taken seriously. 

they other girl admitted to doing exactly what my child said happen and made a written signed statement to that effect! so my child didnt lie!! but she is being punished for it, and second she didnt hide it she got scared and put it in her bra what would you have done, so please dont say thats what all kids say to protect them self's. maybe some do mine did not the other girls mother was found to be a dealer and we are pressing charges against her.  

I am very sorry for your child's troubles.

I am not a lawyer, not do I play one on tv.

However, if my child told me they were going to kill themselves, I would be concerned.  I think you should try to find someone who's a pro she can talk to.  It's well over my head I know enought to know that.

It's been alot of years since I was in 8th grade, but back when I was there, this does not sound like the end of the entire world.  Kids got caught with pot and cigarettes all the time.  Maybe she gets suspended or something?

Police officer threatening her with harm from dogs?  I don't understand.  I ran track and cross country.  They used to have the drug dogs come into the locker room now and again, is that what this threat is?  Yes, they used to do that, and they probably still do.  They can go through your locker as far as I know.  

I have a feeling your child is not telling you everything.  The story doesn't even make sense.  Why would another child hand your child a bag of weed and run away?  Your child got scared and stuck it in her bra?  Why not just drop it right there and walk?

I think if you look this situation over, based on your own post, it doesn't seem to add up.

If I were you, I'd be taking her to someone she can talk to about whatever her issues are.  

I doubt they'll keep her out of school forever.  Just get her head straight and I think it will be ok.

Good luck!

If the school has a zero tolerance policy--expect it to be enforced  for most mere mortals --star quarterbacks of course may not be mere mortals.

Your damage control may be good home schooling and petition for readmission for the fall.

I think its easy to tweak the system to allow for cyberschools but many disagree.

yes my daughter told the truth and the other child wrote to this effect as well my child is as i stated a A/B student and has a very bright future and i know she'll be great its just the way the school treated my daughter before the other student admitted the truth they body search her and here its not legal and threaten her with harm from a dog etc.. for what she was telling the truth! later i found out that the parent of other child is dealing to under age students / kids and i cant get police to do anything! how do you answer this one. 

I have no clue how to zap a parent who is dealing drugs to  kids.  Why not pose such a generic question w/o names to Board in front of press at a public meeting--NO names .  

Your daughter is very young and naturally has no perpective on this - it's not possible for her to see that she's going to get past this and all will be well.  Mom, with all due respect, you need to calm down.  You can't help your daughter through this if you're as hysterical as she is.

The first thing you need to do is take your daughter to her pediatrician so he can evaluate her mental status and see if she should be referred to a psychologist or psychiatrist for further evaluation and perhaps treatment.  An expert practitioner can help her (and you) get through this.

As to the school, if they want to suspend her for drug possession, they can.  You need to let this take it's course and discuss with the school counselor what the options are for completing her school year.

i found out that the parent of other child is dealing to under age students / kids and i cant get police to do anything! how do you answer this one.   You can't force law enforcement to investigate this.  Even if they are, they aren't going to tell you or anybody else about this and let the cat out of the bag.  All you can do is report it to the authorities, including school administraton,and let them handle it.

anna595:

second she didnt hide it she got scared and put it in her bra what would you have done

Concealing it in her clothing on her body IS hiding it.  That is the part you don't seem to understand.  I realize she was scared but the moment she hid it then the school had EVERY reason to suspend her under a zero tolerance policy.

What would I do?  I would IMMEDIATELY turn to the nearest teacher and hand it over stating "Jane Doe just ran by and tossed this at me.  Please give it to administration I don't want to be involved."  I would also get new "friends" this kid is NOTHING but trouble.

As Beth said you can't force law enforcement to prosecute mom.  You can make a report.  IF there is an ongoing investigation they will not discuss it with you.  The goal is not only to catch mom but her supplier and those she deals with.  You don't want one minnow but as much of the pond as you can catch.

i agree with alot of what you guys are saying but my daughter did turn it over to school then they searched her body and said to her your out of here thats not fair this teaches our kids NOT to report these things and on top of it they are placing both my daughter and the other girl at same school, but the other girl gets to go back to home school for 8th grade thats why i'm mad and i as a parent tested my child for drugs that day and now every few days but since she's no longer allowed out she can't do anything and all drug test have been neg. for everything !! i did report the fact that this parent is providing drugs to students at school and her home in the form of "specail brownies" and feel they shouldn't allow this women to keep her daughter until they investigate, not only is this parent endangering her daughter but the rest of our children.

anna595:

but my daughter did turn it over to school then they searched her body and said to her your out of here thats not fair

Something doesn't add up about this:  if she did turn it over then they would not have had to search her to find it. Telling the school about an incident that occurred while concealing the evidence most likely violates the zero tolerance policy.  It is the fact she DID hide it in her bra:  that is considered a deliberate attempt to conceal it by not only school officials but law enforcement.  Had she been under arrest and they searched her in the booking process and found it she would be charged with possession and possibly bringing contraband into a jail facility.

Fair has nothing to do with this.  While another student tossed it to her, what she learned is he who gets caught WITH it gets the harsher punishment.  As part of zero tolerance possession is dealt with more severely than handling  The school is not required to be "fair" about it.

You are free to consult a lawyer to see if there are any other options with the school but generally the school has great lattitude in dealing with these incidents and courts are loathe to interfere.