Unmarried couple brake up

I have a few questions in my messed up situation:

My now ex girlfriend and I bought a house together both names are on the deed and mortgage. We planned on getting married but that didn’t happen because I found out about her lying to me about using drugs. She moved out because I wouldn’t let her smoke dope and that is more important to her. I have not denied her access to the house at all and I did not tell her to move out. She received inheritance from her grandmother and put the down payment of $20,000 on our house. We did not draw up an agreement on who gets what or how to handle the house if we brake up. I have made all the payments on the house and all the house bills now for about three months since she does not have a job (We have only owned the house for about three months). Since she terminated the relationship and has left the house and is in the process of moving out, is she entitled to her 20k back? Do I consider the down payment she made a "gift" since there was no written agreement and it was investment in our relationship because the plan was to get married? Can I make her sign a "quit claims deed" since I am not willing to sell the house and she does not want it?

I recommend you seek the advice of a local attorney.  When ex -GF comes off her high, she might not be so willing to walk away from the property, and by waiting you might be giving her the "upper-hand".

Yeah shes willing to walk away from the property but not the money she put down.

Dally:

Yeah shes willing to walk away from the property but not the money she put down.

In any event, at some point you will need an attorney.  I recommend you act first.

Do you really want your ex-gf to remain on the deed?  It's probably not a smart thing to do for multiple reasons (you decide to sell the house later and would need her cooperation, and she'd be entitled to a portion of the sales; you die and rather than the property to to your heirs, she gets it, depending on how the deed is written; she decides down the road that it's her house too and moves back in...technically not a lot can stop her from doing this; she forces a partition sale at some point in the future when you least expect it, and puts you in a real legal bind with high cost to settle it).  You're probably going to have to buy her out, and that will most likely include giving her back the 20k.  As others have indicated, you really do need professional legal assistance on this one.

The expensive way to resolve this may be to force it to a sale via a 'partition" action---generally a partion starts with presumption of 50/50.

What makes you think she is entitled to her 20K-seems to me you are covering about 100%of the current debt service, maintenance etc? 

Work it out

Dally:

I have made all the payments on the house and all the house bills now for about three months since she does not have a job (We have only owned the house for about three months). Since she terminated the relationship and has left the house and is in the process of moving out, is she entitled to her 20k back?

Yes.

Three months doesn't make a dent in that $20,000.

Dally:

Do I consider the down payment she made a "gift" since there was no written agreement and it was investment in our relationship because the plan was to get married?

You can "consider" it any way you want. But it isn't going to play out that way.

Dally:

Can I make her sign a "quit claims deed" since I am not willing to sell the house and she does not want it?

"Make" her? No.

But you can certainly buy her signature, which is what you are likely going to have to do to get out from under this.

Unless, of course, you'd rather hand over a barrel of money to a lawyer and end up losing the house anyway.

She put her money in--she walked out --apparently on he own call----she remains liable on the mortgage as do you--she seems to have more at risk--so why are you paying the mortgage?

If it were me, I would be sending her a monthly invoice for half the mortgage and costs until the legal issue is completed. That way the amount she owes you can be applied against the $20k if push comes to shove when the house is sold or is tied up in the courts.

I'm in the same boat... only differance is I'm the girlfriend who put down 25k of my inheritance to buy my Dads house. It's not a traditional  mortgage. We are purchasing the home from 4 of my 7 siblings. We will own the house in just 7 more years. We are still together & same a your situation I'm not working (due to health issues). I know for a fact that I would do ANYTHING to make sure that my children will at the very least inherit the 25k I invested in the house. I am not a lawyer & need the advice of one myself. I highly doubt that your ex is going to just walk away & not want her inheritance back. I agree, you need to talk to a lawyer. My guess is it might be in your best interest to be the one to walk away from the situation since you only have 3 months invested in the house. Perhaps you should be the one to sign a quit claim deed? You can't "Make her sign anything". If you sign the quit claim that way your off the house & it's up to her to keep up the payments or let it go into forecloser. I'm just trying to put myself in your shoes since we are both in the same boat with the differance being that I am in a simialr situation as your ex. Since you only have 3 months of house payments invested you really don't have that much to loose compared to the ex's inheritance. How long have you been split up & do you think there is any chance that you might get back together? If that were to happen I would have some kind of a legal agreement drawn up. Good luck.

That fact that she put in 20 K up front does not mean you don't have greater long term exposue--lets assume she put in all her inheritance , has no job, is bulled headed not to seek a job, and is about judgement proof....and on other hand you may have good job and at least modest savings---if the deal goes sour and the lender has full recourse--guess who will take the hit?

You cannot force her to sign a quit claim. You should offer to buy her out by paying back the down payment. Otherwise you will probably spend more than that in litigation expenses.

Be careful to not get yourself OFF the deed by quitclaim or otherwise, and NOT off the mortgage. You need to get off the mortgage, too.

You are facing big legal costs to litigate this one--to me it makes far more sense to make her a nice clean offer such as ---

you deliver her a quit claim for the property upon simultaneous confirmation that you are OFF the mortgage/note obligation in a ready to file satisfaction piece. Tit for Tat  and at time same is consumated you simply walk away from home--and terminate any utilities in your name.

Unless you have a burning desire to spend big funds for a legal debate--let her have the house and she gets her 20K--all you need is a clean walk and all that requires is she gets you off the mortgage/note .

Well I spoke with an attorney and the bank today...not looking good, well for her its not. One of two things can happen and I left the decision up to her.

Option A. would be that I go to the bank and take out a loan and tack it on to the mortgage. Only problem with that is they are only willing to loan me 10K. This is only half of what she wants back.

Option B. If she don’t want option A, I will have to file a petition with the courts to have a judge make a sheriff sale on the house and what is left over after the mortgage is paid off is split 50/50.

Neither get back her 20K, but she should have thought about that before lying to me and then leaving me over dope.

This kind of situation with unmarried couples that bake up after a house purchase seems to have little information available. So after the brake up its pretty much whatever both parties agree upon is going to be the final out come. But in my situation I’m letting her make that decision.

Thanks to all that replied.